[timckelley]

Four days ago my divorce became legal and final. I came back to this thread because I just now noticed that some shows have recently recorded on my TiVo that were programmed by my ex-wife!

Right now I’ve deleted all my own shows because I’ve watched them all but yet my TiVo is 79% full.

I suppose I could just wipe out all her stuff and there’s nothing she can do about it. I should explain that one of the conditions of the divorce decree, requires me to continue storing her belongings in my house for the next year and a half or when I sell the house, which ever comes first.

Also in the decree just to avoid arguments I gave her the right to claim anything in the house she wants as her own but with only very few exceptions and one of those exceptions is that the TiVo Bolt is spelled out as being my TiVo.

Isn’t it funny that of all the things that could be spelled out it was a TiVo that got spelled out?

She still seems upset and nervous about being able to survive without me so I don’t want to upset her anymore than I have to, but I really don’t have to tolerate having her stuff on my TiVo if I don’t want to. I’ll probably have a conversation with her soon about these things that are on my TiVo. It’s possible maybe she doesn’t care about these shows; I don’t know. But I guess she must still have season passes or to do items on my TiVo.

 

[bkc56]

Hard to believe it's been 16 years since this thread started. It's good that at least legal progress has been made, and it sounds like you have the right to do what you want with your Tivo.

I guess if you have the space, you don't need to clean it off immediately (unless you want that closure). But at some point, soonish, you'll want to delete any season passes that aren't yours, and some time after that, clear the disk too.

 

[jrtroo]

From personal experience, I would start putting all of that stuff you are storing into a single space and look to make the rest of the place yours (and marking it such so that there is no confusion in the future). I found painting a place can really change the look and feel of room/house. I would include the Tivo recordings in that as well.

 

[Adam C.]

Of all the things a person needs to worry about during a divorce, I find it hard to believe that recordings on a Tivo are one of them.

 

[stile99]

Of all the things a person needs to worry about during a divorce, I find it hard to believe that recordings on a Tivo are one of them.

Not up on the story, are you?

 

[Fofer]

Of all the things a person needs to worry about during a divorce, I find it hard to believe that recordings on a Tivo are one of them.

Pick one:

a) that you find it "hard to believe" says more about you than it does about Tim and his ex-wife

b) that you find it appropriate to post your judgment about his and/or her worries at this time says more about you than it does about Tim and his ex-wife

c) it's not about the "recordings on a TiVo."

 

[mattyro7878]

I am not married. I have had a few LTR's. I don't know the story but I can easily believe anything that can be told about the end of a relationship. It is mind boggling how bad or good things can end.

 

[timckelley]

I think one thing I had stacked against me is that statistically the rate of divorce among couples that have a special needs child is higher than in the general population.

Many times she has personally blamed me for my son‘s autism because many people think I myself am on the spectrum albeit the high functioning end of the spectrum. (This includes my uncle who is a doctor, as well is my mother.) In fact I couldn’t speak until I was five years old, after I received speech therapy.

And so my ex told me I should never have been willing to have children because of my genes. She also has regretted many times having a child but I never have had regrets, and I still don’t.

 

[Fofer]

And so my ex told me I should never have been willing to have children because of my genes. She also has regretted many times having a child but I never have had regrets, and I still don't.

That is an absolutely awful thing for her to have said to you. From where I'm sitting, I'd say you're much better off without her as your wife. And your son would probably be better off without her as his mother.

 

[Mikeguy]

I think one thing I had stacked against me is that statistically the rate of divorce among couples that have a special needs child is higher than in the general population.

Many times she has personally blamed me for my son's autism because many people think I myself am on the spectrum albeit the high functioning end of the spectrum. (This includes my uncle who is a doctor, as well is my mother.) In fact I couldn't speak until I was five years old, after I received speech therapy.

And so my ex told me I should never have been willing to have children because of my genes. She also has regretted many times having a child but I never have had regrets, and I still don't.

Alarm, Will Robinson, alarm. It must be nice to be her. And, thankfully, you are you. Find a nice reporter.

 

[shwru980r]

Four days ago my divorce became legal and final. I came back to this thread because I just now noticed that some shows have recently recorded on my TiVo that were programmed by my ex-wife!

Right now I've deleted all my own shows because I've watched them all but yet my TiVo is 79% full.

I suppose I could just wipe out all her stuff and there's nothing she can do about it. I should explain that one of the conditions of the divorce decree, requires me to continue storing her belongings in my house for the next year and a half or when I sell the house, which ever comes first.

Also in the decree just to avoid arguments I gave her the right to claim anything in the house she wants as her own but with only very few exceptions and one of those exceptions is that the TiVo Bolt is spelled out as being my TiVo.

Isn't it funny that of all the things that could be spelled out it was a TiVo that got spelled out?

She still seems upset and nervous about being able to survive without me so I don't want to upset her anymore than I have to, but I really don't have to tolerate having her stuff on my TiVo if I don't want to. I'll probably have a conversation with her soon about these things that are on my TiVo. It's possible maybe she doesn't care about these shows; I don't know. But I guess she must still have season passes or to do items on my TiVo.

You could change the season passes to Keep at Most 2 shows or anything less than Keep Until Delete.

 

[Mikeguy]

No need to foment upset and unrest . . . .

 

[Fofer]

No need to keep accumulating recordings for her, on his equipment, as negotiated. They're divorced.

 

[Mikeguy]

But there's a child and a related on-going relationship in the mix, not to mention a past relationship and an on-going contractual relationship. Mind you, I'm all for moving on (for both parties). But it's not my relationship.

 

[timckelley]

My son only watches the family room TiVo and my TiVo is not in that room. If she has recordings on there for him it really should not be on that TiVo.

 

[Mikeguy]

Totally apart from relationship issues, I'd check the obligations under the divorce contract--if there's an obligation to store things for her for a period of time, I could see that as covering TiVo recordings. But, depending on the wording, that doesn't necessarily include the obligation for future recordings to be made and stored.

I would kind of hope that this could be worked through consensually--e.g. something like, I'll keep on having my TiVo box record your shows for (3) months, giving you time to buy and set up your own TiVo box; and I'll keep storing your shows for 6 months, giving you time to transfer what you want to keep to your own box.

 

[shwru980r]

Totally apart from relationship issues, I'd check the obligations under the divorce contract--if there's an obligation to store things for her for a period of time, I could see that as covering TiVo recordings. But, depending on the wording, that doesn't necessarily include the obligation for future recordings to be made and stored.

I would kind of hope that this could be worked through consensually--e.g. something like, I'll keep on having my TiVo box record your shows for (3) months, giving you time to buy and set up your own TiVo box; and I'll keep storing your shows for 6 months, giving you time to transfer what you want to keep to your own box.

But the recordings are tied to the Tivo they are recorded on for cable, or the Tivo account if the shows are OTA. There is no practical way for the Ex to take possession of the shows that are being recorded. Also, my understanding of encrypted content is that the consumer owns or rents the media the content is stored on, not the content, and they own or rent the equipment that is licensed to decrypt the content for playback.

The shows that are being recorded are not the Ex's belongings because Tim owns the Tivo.

 

[Mikeguy]

But the recordings are tied to the Tivo they are recorded on for cable, or the Tivo account if the shows are OTA. There is no practical way for the Ex to take possession of the shows that are being recorded. Also, my understanding of encrypted content is that the consumer owns or rents the media the content is stored on, not the content, and they own or rent the equipment that is licensed to decrypt the content for playback.

The shows that are being recorded are not the Ex's belongings because Tim owns the Tivo.

There are various means by which the recordings might be accessed or archived. Regardless, I'm simply suggesting to keep the terms of the divorce contract in mind, and to keep in mind that this relationship is going to continue indefinitely into the future, due to child issues--it would seem best, to me, to avoid poking the bear, if do-able.

 

[shwru980r]

There are various means by which the recordings might be accessed or archived. Regardless, I'm simply suggesting to keep the terms of the divorce contract in mind, and to keep in mind that this relationship is going to continue indefinitely into the future, due to child issues--it would seem best, to me, to avoid poking the bear, if do-able.

I see your point, but at the same time this creates false expectations. At some point, the agreement to store the EX's belongings will end and the belongings will be turned over to the EX. There is no way to turn over the recordings unless Tim gives her the Tivo that contains the recordings.

 

[Mikeguy]

I see your point, but at the same time this creates false expectations. At some point, the agreement to store the EX's belongings will end and the belongings will be turned over to the EX. There is no way to turn over the recordings unless Tim gives her the Tivo that contains the recordings.

Yeah, from what I've read previously, I envision that this is going to be a landmine come-what-may. I'd be inclined, if it was me, to discuss with the ex that the recordings are going to be deleted (at the end of the 1-1/2 year period?) but then offer to "sell" the Bolt box to the ex for the cost of a replacement box (with Lifetime subscription) for me.