A dog on blue screen ate my minis

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So here's the situation. I had a plain old 4-tuner Roamio that served me well for many years. Last month it died (no lights, no power) so I bought a used Roamio Pro off ebay. The Pro came, hooked it up, it works great!

The problem is my 3 minis - they keep landing on a screen with a blue tv in the background and a cartoon dog chewing on wire. Across the bottom of the screen it says "Please check your internet connection." The minis boot up ok, they connect to the internet and download updates fine. They just won't stay on tv. I can watch live tv for about 30 seconds before they dump me over to the dog screen. This happening on all 3 minis.

I've tried every fix I can think of, rebooting everything about a million times...checking all my connections...taking everything back to the factory setting and going through guided set up...spent and hour on the phone with Tivo customer support where they ran me through ever trick on their script.

Before I give up and chuck all 3 minis in the trash, I thought I'd see if anyone else had ever had this problem or had any ideas on how to fix it.